Handling Difficult Kids

[Lyria38 at AOL.COM]

My name is Carole Ware and I have also been enjoying the server for a
while.  I currently work with the Boys and Girls Clubs of Manatee County in
Bradenton FL.  My position is to target the type of children you are
talking about.  I serve two populations,, one at risk children(even though
all children are now at risk) which usually includes younger children that
are having some type of problems fitting into the club.  The second is
youth usually 13 and up that have gotten into some type of legal problems
and have service hours. Some ideas that have helped me over the years.

Alot of it is about relationship and respect,,,Many times adults have
"treated" them as kids, taken the approach I am the adult and you have
nothing to teach me.  Many times kids just want to be listened to and heard
and given the same respect that we expect them to give us.  Be honest and
up front with them because they see all the inconsistencies in the world.
Let them take ownership of the program,, let them set the rules, set up a
teen council that will give out consequences for misbehavior.  Go to them
and say hey what happening is not working we as staff need help because we
want this to work but we have to have some help.  Sometimes if we as adults
remember to ask what it is they need we would be surprised with the great
ideas they come up.  Street Kids have great skills,,, they are capable of
survival and even good business skills (illegal ones) but the  skills none
the less.

Remember you cant always reach everyone,,, but the trick is you never know
which one you are reaching.  You might not ever see the fruits of your
labor,,  you never know what that child will take and apply in his or her
life years down the road

Good luck and keep the faith,, it is easy to work with the "good" kids but
they usually don't need saving like the ones your dealing with.

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